Max: Mwa ha ha

They said I had mad skillz at the university!

Max: Too True

Sent to me via email. I will credit the original author if I ever find out who it is.

If you live in St. Louis, you'll understand this.

If you've ever visited St. Louis you'll understand this.

If you've never been to St. Louis, consider this your Visitor's Guide To Driving in St. Louis.

1. There are 75 "official neighborhoods" in the City of St. Louis. St. Louisans commonly give directions (especially for restaurants) to strangers based on these neighborhoods which aren't marked on any maps that are handed out by the tourist board, the AAA, or Mapquest.

2. There are 54 school districts -- on the Missouri side alone -- each of which has their own school bus system and scheduled times to block traffic.

3. There are 91 official municipalities in St. Louis County. Each municipality has its own rules, regulations, and, often, their own police department.

4. More importantly, most have their own snow removal contracts so it's not uncommon to drive down a road in winter and have one block plowed, the next salted, the next piled with snow, and the last partially cleared by residents wanting to get out of their driveways.

5. Snow plowing is never a problem in the City of St. Louis. They plow nothing, and if the forecast calls for snow, they close everything; except on "The Hill" (refer to #1 above) where each homeowner goes out to the street and shovels out one car-sized rectangle and then stands watch over it.

6. Any car parked longer than 4 hours in the city is considered a parts store.

7. The City of Ballwin actually proposed that drivers use connecting strip mall parking lots to get from place to place rather than drive on Manchester Road in order to cut the traffic on Manchester.

8. Laclede Station Road mysteriously changes names as you cross intersections. As does McCausland, Lindbergh, Watson, Reavis Barracks, Fee Fee, McKnight, Airport Road, Midland, Olive, and Clarkson. Gravois Road can only be pronounced by a native. Ditto for Spoede and Chouteau.

9. A St. Louisan from South County has never been to North County and vice versa. West County has everything delivered.

10. No native St. Louisan knows that Lindbergh runs from South County to North County! And, if you tell them, they will not believe you.

11. Lindbergh belongs to every neighborhood through which it passes except Kirkwood, who had the nerve to creatively change the name to " Kirkwood Road"

12. There are 2 interchanges to exit from Highway 40 onto Clayton Road and 2 for Big Bend. Stay alert, people!

13. If you need directions to O'Fallon, make sure to specify Illinois or Missouri. This is also true for Troy, Maryville, St. Charles, Springfield, Columbia....

14. The Page Avenue extension and Airport expansion projects took over 20 years to get approved and St. Louisans lost track of how many political figures claimed them as their own ideas.

15. St. Louisans were aghast when the federal government required them to redo the highway signs to indicate that the federal highways went to cities in other states instead of local municipalities.

16. Drivers are starting to cut their OWN plates rather than go through the Missouri Department of Motor Vehicles to get new tags. You can also purchase tags from dealers behind QuiK Shops in the city. They are cheaper, the clerks are nicer, and the service is faster.

17. Lambert Field and St. Louis International Airport really are the same place. The East Terminal, however, is a different place.

18. Highway 270 is our daily version of the NASCAR circuit. (Same goes for Highway 70.) You can go all four directions on Highway 270: North and South in West County, East and West in South County, and East and West in North County. Confused? So are the St. Louis drivers.

19. The outer belt is Highway 270 which turns into Highway 255 in South County. The inner belt is Highway 170. Highway 370 is an outer-outer belt. Highway 40 is the same as Interstate 64 (but only through the middle part of St. Louis).

20. The morning rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:00 AM The evening rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:00 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning. Never ever try to cross a bridge in St. Louis during rush hour unless you have a sack lunch and a port-a-potty in the car.

21. YIELD signs are for decoration only. No native St. Louisan will ever grasp the concept.

22. If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect, or has been on for the last 17 miles.

23. Construction on Highways 40, 64, 70, 255, 270, 44, 55 and 170 is a way of life, and a permanent form of entertainment.

24. All old ladies with blue hair in Cadillacs (driving on Olive west of 270) have the right of way.

25. If it snows or rains, stay home!!

26. Many people in St. Louis are unaware of the fact that you don't need a passport to get to Illinois or St. Charles.

Max: U.S. indicts 50 Colombians it calls 'narcoterrorists'

CNN.com - U.S. indicts 50 Colombians it calls 'narcoterrorists' - Mar 22, 2006: "Fifty leaders of the Colombian rebel group FARC, described as 'narcoterrorists' by U.S. authorities, have been indicted in Washington for allegedly exporting more than $25 billion worth of cocaine to the U.S. and other countries, Justice Department officials announced Wednesday."

In other news, a police officer reported that he gave a speeding ticket to a mototerrorist.

Max: Thoughts

Sometimes I want to throw off the shackles of this life I in which I have trapped myself and go out into the world in search of adventure.

Usually I just go have a lie down until the feeling passes.

Max: The Latest Model

The Latest Model :: By David Firth (2006)

Max: Shoot Me

KMOV.com | St. Louis, MO | Top Stories

"Missouri legislators in Jefferson City considered a bill that would name Christianity the state's official 'majority' religion."

Max: Real Life Simpsons Intro

YouTube - Real Life Simpsons Intro

Neat

Max: Settlement ends Blackberry case

BBC NEWS | Business | Settlement ends Blackberry case

"The maker of the Blackberry device has reached a $612.5m (£349m) settlement to end a legal dispute that could have closed the service in the US."

Woo hoo! Time to get me a Crackberry.

Jericho: I feel like $5 bucks.

I have long had a dream that I would figure out a way to skip out on the 9 to 5 jive and go to work in my own business. I have thought that maybe I could do something online. Something creative that would make some dough, enough to live on. I never thought I'd make enough to get rich on. So, I have tried a few things. None have worked so far.

From time to time, IWDC has been the vehicle with which I had hoped to make a living. I mean, think about it, imagine that everyday you could come out here and I would have something new for you to read. Max would contribute where and when he could, or, best case, Max and I would BOTH have a new thing out here for you, everyday! Wouldn't that be great?

If I had the time to concentrate on this site, that would be the way of things. If this site was making me a living, I would have that time. So, here and there I have tried to push in that direction.

I have tried several different types of ads. Early on, most of the ads on this site were affiliate links. IWDC would have made something if the person who clicked also bought an item, usually an expensive item. Didn't make dime-one with that. The ads that made money in the dot.com boom were ads that paid per click. Sure, $.02 isn't much money, but if 10,000 visitors clicked on the ad, you could make a few bucks! Of course, the industry averages about a 2 percent click through rate, so if you wanted 10,000 people to click through a month, you would want 500,000 hits a month. IWDC is lucky to get 1000 hits a month and we average less than 1 percent click-through.

And there was the problem with IWDC when it came to pay-per-click. Most companies that we could have sold our advertising space to wanted at least 25,000 hits a month. So, that wasn't going to happen. Finally, Google launched their ads and we tried to get them. We were initially refused, because we were considered a "personal site". Then, Google bought Blogger and all the sudden every blog is running Google ads. In the 2.5 years we have had Google ads, we've made $10 in click throughs, we'll get a check when we make $100. I'm probably breaking some rule of Google's by telling you this, they'll probably tell me that I can't run their ads anymore, but as you can see, it's not much of a loss, been thinking about ditching them anyway.

Now, the entire four years we have run IWDC, we have had a link for DotEasy on the page. DotEasy is a web-hosting company. DotEasy hosts this page right here. DotEasy is just that: easy. For $25, you now get 100MB of space, 1GB of transfer per month and your domain name registered. I have set up five domains, three through DotEasy and two through two other different companies, one of those was very recent. DotEasy is, in my opinion, the simplest way for a small biz to get a web site and you get excellent value for your money. I'm not just saying this, I mean it, I love working with DotEasy.

So, that link leads off to their affiliate program. Everytime someone buys a domain from DotEasy by clicking on that link, and they stay with it for 120 days, I get $5 bucks. It sounds like an easy way to make money, and it's a product I believe in. After four years, I finally got a check a couple weeks ago. Guess how much? Good guess! Exactly $15 dollars, you're good at this game.

Anyway, I was happy to get it. I had just renewed IWDC, so it felt like a $15 dollar rebate. I sent it off to the bank with Steph. She calls me from the bank. The check is drawn on a Canadian bank. Different banking system, $10 service charge to process the check. After four years, I have made a total of $5 on IWDC.

Now, I have to send a check to Max for $2.50!

Max: Hybrid Living Home Almost Complete

Treehugger: Hybrid Living Home Almost Complete:

"Hybrid Technologies, the same company that had a hand in the Mullen GT, is almost done building the Hybrid Living Home. Through a bevy of alternative energy and 'smart home' features, the house is designed to be completely off the grid, and is designed to be compatible with Hybrid Technologies' Lithium-battery powered vehicles, allowing for a totally emission-free lifestyle."

Max: Homeland Security Sez, "Stay in Debt."

Scripps Howard News Service

"They were told, as they moved up the managerial ladder at the call center, that the amount they had sent in was much larger than their normal monthly payment. And if the increase hits a certain percentage higher than that normal payment, Homeland Security has to be notified. And the money doesn't move until the threat alert is lifted."

Jericho: More Humbled than Usual

Sure, we don't post terribly often. Sometimes it's weeks between postings. I might go months between postings - then I usually make up for it with a twelve pager.

Either way, no matter how hard we try, I don't think IWDC could ever be as sad as this!