Max: Chocolate Coated Lies

Are Noka's chocolates worth the money?

Max: Secret Documents To Be Declassified

On HowStuffWorks.com

So what can we expect to learn when these pages become accessible to the public? We're not talking about small secrets here. Experts says the documents will tell us about the inner workings of such events and periods as World War II; the Cold War; the McCarthy-era search for Communist sympathizers in the United States and the very real presence of Soviet spies in the U.S. government's upper ranks; the Cuban missile crisis; the Vietnam War and the government's anti-war-protestor activities including surveillance and penetration of activist groups; the CIA's secret experiments with LSD; the Camp David Accords that resulted in a peace treaty between Israel and Egypt; the Iran hostage crisis in 1979; and the Soviet Union's attack on Afghanistan that same year.

Max: Sex Toy Safety

I found an interesting article about sex toy safety, via Boing Boing.

There are no pics, so the sex toy article may or may not be NSFW depending on how uptight your IT department is.

Max: For Jericho And His Fellow Mac Heads

Using the terminal to access hidden games in OSX.

Jericho: Fangy Bloodmas!

Merrys and Happys everyone ...

Just a quick note. For the last few weeks, I've been working on an outside project that has been a ton of fun. The site is Sisters of Blood. It's a blog devoted to Lesbian Vampire movies. I had never heard of such a thing before this, but there you go.

This isn't my site. I met the owner via Craigslist and as it stands I'm the primary writer, reviewer and community caretaker (read: unpaid bottle washer and whipping boy.) It's been a ton of fun! I've been doing all kinds of research and teaching myself the ropes. I've already reviewed two movies - older flicks, I'm kinda teaching myself the history of the genre.

Anyway, go check it out. If you like what you see, or have any strong feelings at all, be sure to leave a comment. If you have a movie you would like us to review, or a website or just about anything else, let us know with a comment.

So, of course, Friday night I had a long conversation with a whole room of nice gay, pan and trans people - I think I was the token heterosexual. Now, I just hope no one takes this site seriously and gets offended.

Max: Blasphemy Challenge

Max: Hack The GP2X

GP2X, an open source game console. To see it in action, download episode 122 at dl.tv. They demo the GP2X at about the 28 minute mark.

Max: Questions What Need Answering

I found these on digg.com and felt I could further our evolution as a species by answering them.

Whose idea was it to put an “S” in the word “lisp”?

Thome athhole.

What is the speed of darkness?

Darkness is the absence of light. It has no speed.

If the temperature is zero outside today and it’s going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Twice is a statement of relation, but the question provides no reference point for the relation. It is meaningless.

If it’s true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

They are leaches. We must destroy them.

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

Statistically speaking, you are a dumbass.

Can you cry underwater?

Yes, but as crying involves respiration, you won't cry for long.

How is it that we put a man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Priorities.

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Because it amuses them.

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?”

Some pervert.

Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken there… I’m gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it’s bum.”

We are not the only egg stealing primate, so eating eggs likely predates Homo Sapien

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Have you ever toasted a bagel or English muffin? They both take longer than sliced bread.

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Because you forgot to change the light bulb.

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Because people don't wear toilets on their asses.

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway ?

It gives the illusion of some degree of "modesty".

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs !

Evolution. While they share a common evolutionary ancestor they are the endpoints of two different evolutionary branches.

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream ??

Blind people do dream. Except for the recently blinded, the blind rarely "see" in their dreams. Rather, they interact with their dreams using the senses they use to interact with the waking world.

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

A form of torture.

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

According to Johnson and Johnson's website, it's made primarily from mineral oil.

If electricity comes from electrons, does mortality come from morons?

And sharp or explosive objects.

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

The tune is catchy and easy to remember.

Stop singing and read on . . . . . .. . . . .

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Most likely an illiterate will have a low income and will probably buy cheaper soup, so no.

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

It is a question of choice versus force. I might get mad if you grab my dick, but that doesn't mean I don't touch it myself.

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

No, but it occupies stupid people while they wait.

Max: 50 Greatest Cartoons

A list of links to online videos of the "50 Greatest Cartoons".

Max: Classifried

Read about how Shrub is protecting us from dangerous information.

Just how many different ways has the Bush Administration tried to hide once-public information sources from the public record?

Max: What Is It?

I'm not at all clear on what it is, but I am pretty sure it involved LSD.

NSFW

Max: Today In Dipshits

An air stewardess is claiming religious discrimination against an airline which she says banned her from taking the Bible to Saudi Arabia.

The stewardess has been told by BMI that it is against the law of the insular Middle Eastern country to bring in religious books other than the Koran.

The woman, who is understood to be a committed Christian, takes her bible everywhere she goes and is now set to take the airline to an industrial tribunal claiming discrimination on religious grounds.

It's not discrimination. It is the law of the fucking country you're going to. It's a stupid law but you don't get a free pass just because you're a "committed Christian."

Max: Old Jazz "Soundie"

I'm posting this because it is fucking awesome when the bass player completely loses his shit at around 1:15.

Max: Thought 4 The Day

I like this guy

Let’s say you’ve caught a suspect and you’re sure he’s a terrorist, and you’re sure there’s a nuclear bomb somewhere in Manhattan, and you’re sure he knows where it is, and you’re sure this particular terrorist has been trained to resist torture just long enough that you could never get the true location of the bomb out of him in time. But you’re also sure this particular terrorist is a pervert! And he tells you that if you’ll rape your own child in front of him, he’ll tell you exactly where the bomb is and how to disarm it. And you’re sure that he will, because your intelligence is that good in exactly that way.

Max: Pot - The Biggest Cash Crop In The US

Pot Is The Biggest Cash Crop In The US

A report released today by a marijuana public policy analyst contends that the market value of pot produced in the U.S. exceeds $35 billion — far more than the crop value of such heartland staples as corn, soybeans and hay, which are the top three legal cash crops.

Thank our Christian God that we will never legalize and tax this crop.

Max: Take Two And Try Not To Go Psycho In The Morning

Today I started easing onto my new drug and off of one of my others.

As per usual, I have been told not to expect to see results for a couple of weeks.

If you suddenly start seeing long posts from me again, you'll know it worked.

Max: Breakdown Lane

If anybody is wondering (or even cares) why my posts have dropped back to occasional news links, it is because I am insane again.

For one month I knew what it was like to be free of depression. I knew what it felt to be happy to wake up and face the day. I knew what it felt like to have the motivation and brain capacity to learn, read, write or whatever struck my fancy that day. I knew what it was like to not be irritated by things that no sane man should be irritated by. I knew what it felt like to talk to a person, even a complete stranger, and have no fear of what they might think of me if I dared be myself.

Now I am back where I started. I'm worse because I now know what it really feels like to be a functional human being. I hope that sometime soon my Dr. and I will find something that works and keeps working. But I am also afraid because I would not be the first member of my family to fight a long, losing battle with depression. And quite frankly I am not, nor have I ever been, as strong as her.

Jericho: Christian Weirdos

We have blasted the Christian Reich out here nearly weekly. But, when a shining example of a Christian pops his head up, it's our duty to point to him.

Thus, I point you here.

I stand here and DEFY anyone to tell me that these kids are wrong!

So - if these guys are right, as I'm sure they are, will the Reich change? If the Reich doesn't change, what does that make them?

Jericho: Lou Dobbs might be an Irate Weirdo

Okay, I don't know much about Lou's politics, I haven't read much from him.

However, on this point - we agree, and I like the way he writes about it.

This is a total embarassment. I'm appalled that this shit happened in my town and in my country. Wake up, people.

Max: UK 'plot' terror charge dropped

A Pakistani judge has ruled there is not enough evidence to try a key suspect in an alleged airline bomb plot on terrorism charges.

He has moved the case of Rashid Rauf, a Briton, from an anti-terrorism court to a regular court, where he faces lesser charges such as forgery.

Pakistan has presented Mr Rauf as one of the ringleaders behind the alleged plan to blow up flights out of London.

The British authorities say they foiled it with Pakistan's help in August.

They say proceedings against suspects arrested in Britain will go ahead.

This now dismissed case is why you can't take liquids on planes.

Despite this setback, I'm sure our government with carry on fighting the war on mouthwash.

Max: Drilling Through An LCD

Max: Funnier than Santa on Crack

Drivl.com | Funnier than Santa on crack

What's blue and smells of paint?
Blue paint

What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot

What's worse than finding 10 babies in a bin?
Finding 1 baby in 10 bins

Why does Rupert the Bear wear yellow and black chequered trousers?
Because he's a fucking twat.

Max: Firefly Reborn as MMOG

Wired News: Firefly Reborn as Online Universe

Like Capt. Mal Reynolds stumbling in after a bar fight, the short-lived but much beloved sci-fi series Firefly will soon make an unexpected return, not as a TV show, but as a massively multiplayer online game.

Max: How to use "Furoshiki

How to use "Furoshiki

Max: Rolamite

Donald F. Wilkes: Rolamite

As basic as the lever or pulley, the simple concept called 'Rolamite' promises a revolution in mechanical design.

What's a Rolamite? It looks like a simple gadget made with two rollers and a steel band, but it's much more. As basic as the wheel, the lever, or the hinge, it is the only elementary machine discovered this century. Its use will be widespread --- in everything from switches, thermostats, and valves to pumps and clutches, and as almost frictionless bearings.

Max: Top Ten Signs You're Obsessed with 'Lost'

Max: Thoughts

A lot of people looking at Window$ Vi$ta are so displeased that they are saying either they just won't upgrade or will switch to Mac or Linux.

Micro$oft recent invested large money in Linux distributor Novell.

A decade ago M$ invest large money in Apple.

The most recent version of Boot Camp (which boots Windows on Intel Mac boxes) includes support for running previously Mac only apps like iSight and iChat.

Mac is Unix based.

Could we in the next few years see M$ and Apple coming together to make an attempt at the ultimate OS, bridging the worlds of Mac, Windows and *nix?

Max: Girl, 13, charged as sex offender and victim

DenverPost.com - Girl, 13, charged as sex offender and victim

Utah Supreme Court justices acknowledged Tuesday that they were struggling to wrap their minds around the concept that a 13-year-old girl could be both an offender and a victim for the same act - in this case, having consensual sex with her 12-year-old boyfriend.

The Ogden, Utah, girl was put in this odd position because she was found guilty of violating a state law that prohibits sex with someone under age 14. She also was the victim in the case against her boyfriend, who was found guilty of the same violation by engaging in sexual activity with her.

I wonder if they would prosecute a minor for sexually abusing themselves for masturbating.

Max: Jack's Gift by Jason Stoddard

"Jack's Gift" by Jason Stoddard

“Did you . . . did you see them, daddy?”

“I did,” David said. He still remembered. He was nine when Dark Christmas came. He knew there were lots of different kinds of Santas.

Max: Retards On Parade

Think Progress » Pundit Attacking Muslim Congressman Is Bush Appointee to Holocaust Memorial Board

Right-wing talk show host Dennis Prager has raised a firestorm charging that Rep.-elect Keith Ellison (D-MN), the first Muslim elected to Congress, must swear in using a Bible. He said that if Ellison swears in with a Quran, it would “undermin[e] American civilization” and be akin to swearing in with a copy of Hitler’s “Mein Kampf.”

Prager is not a typical talk radio host. In September, he was appointed by President Bush to a five-year term on the taxpayer-funded United States Holocaust Memorial Council. A statement announcing Prager’s appointment praised his “unique moral voice.”

Max: Stupid People Getting What They Deserve

For those who don't know, the two metal posts are designed to only allow buses and cargo vehicles. Some bright sparks get what they deserve when they try to sneak in behind.

Max: Life At Low G, cont

Or read the whole thing (so far) here.


It went on for months. Every so often we would be sent a new packet with new applications to be sent in. Cassie paid our rent and other expenses. She also kept us on a short lease. Keeping Andy occupied was not that hard. Me, I had another itch to scratch. But I was forbidden to do any system cracking, even recreational cracking was denied me.

"We are three unemployed roomies looking for entry level work," Cassie explained. "No doubt we are under their scrutiny and we can't afford to do anything that will tip them off."

Eventually, all three of us were called in for interviews. As no one is allowed on Incremetech's ground without being thoroughly vetted, we were told we would be transported from our apartment to an undisclosed, secure location. We were to wear clothing with no pockets and brinng no electronic devices with us. Three days later, our transport arrived. It was an computer driven hover with no windows. Oddly, it was neon green. I expected it to be black.

We sat for hours, making the sort of small talk three roomies with no ulterior motives make. We talked about how it was past time we got jobs, how our savings were dried up, how neat it would be to work for Incremetech.

Finally, the hover stopped and the door opened. Three large, rather frighting and well armed men were there to greet us.

"Come this way," one of them said.

"So, are you in security?" Andy asked as we followed them.

"Small talk is a potential security breach," one of the replied. That rather put an end to the conversation.

Finally, we came to an open door. One of the guards pointed into the room. The three of us went in. There was a vid screen on one wall. Three chairs sat facing it. Taking the hint, we all sat down. We hardly even noticed when the door slid shut behind us.

The screen lit up. It was satellite footage of a building on fire. It took me a moment to realize that it was our apartment complex.

"What the hell?" Cassie said first.

"That footage is several hours old," a disembodied voice came from the screen. "We only transmit data physically. It is slow but secure. I can assure you your building has been quite destroyed, along with everything you own."

"What the fuck is going on here?" Andy yelled at the screen. The screen responded by going blank.

"Hey? Hello? What the fuck?" Andy continued along those lines until he realized the screen was not going to respond.

"It looks like we screwed up," Cassie calmly offered.

"Screwed up? What the fuck? What is going to happen now."

"I don't know," she replied.

It finally dawned on me that my comp was in our now immolated apartment. I don't remember too much of what happened for a couple of hours after I realized that.

Jericho: We Survived!

I thought we might lose the site for a day or two, but DotEasy let us slide. We had 1021.07 MB of throughput last month. They really could have closed us down when we hit 1000, but it looks like we are just small enough potatoes for it to not matter. It's a November Miracle!

What did you expect? November Miracles are small. Wait for December for the real fireworks! :)

Max: Life At Low G, brief update

Or read the whole thing (so far) here.


I enjoy watching 20th Century 2D's. Some of them are about spies and other adventurers who would use wit, cunning, violence and technology to break into enemy buildings, all with cheesy 20th Century music playing in the background.


Our initial penetration was nowhere near as interesting. It started the day our orders arrived. In it was what little public information there was on Incremetech. There were also three paper applications for employment already filled out in a remarkable forgery of our own handwriting.

"What do we do if we don't get hired?" I asked.

"We keep trying until we find a way in," Cassie replied.

"According to this, I am a borderline illiterate with no comp experience." I was insulted.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Cassie replied with nothing resembling sincerity.

"The point of that," Andy added, "is that you will be less likely to be watched if they don't think you are a threat to their systems. And it looks like I am a rather highly qualified salesman."

"Well, let's get this shit delivered," Cassie said.

We spent the next couple of hours traveling around the city to mail drop offs that were near the addresses listed on our applications. After that, we waited.